I was scrolling through the pages of a old journal when I came across something I’d written on 11/21/2005. I am not quite sure what I was growing through that time but I am sure what am I about to share with you helped me through, as I hope it will help someone else out there. (Oprah Winfrey) I think I got this from her I have her name written next to the date. So Oprah please don’t think I am plagiarizing. This is in regards to those of you who are dating and looking for something serious. Also as I read these words, they can pertain to employee boss relationships especially in small businesses run by men who think they rule women.
Words to Live By
If a man wants you nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be.
Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find out what truly makes you happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t be friends! A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don’t stay because you think “it will get better”. You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you!
Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. If he didn’t stay with any of them after getting them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. However never let a man know everything, he will use it against you later.
You can not change a man’s behavior, change comes from within. Never let a man define who you are. You can’t complete one another, a relationship takes two whole individuals.
Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he will cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you allow him to treat you. All men are not dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending (meaning you should not be the leader) though relationships are about compromise. Godly relationships requires the man to lead.
She concludes this with “dating is fun even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you, when he knows, when you are readily available to him he takes it for granted. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything you need”(Oprah 2005). (that doesn’t mean getting your hair and nails did) This means being the man of God that you need him to be. Remember people there are forces out there deeper than many of you can possibly imagine trying to pull as many people as they possibly can. You have a choice in everything you do. Choosing a job, choosing a man, you don’t have to take these “words to live by” and treat them as though they were they’re the Ten Commandments”. But my advice to you all, both ladies and men is to put God first in all things and I guarantee He will lead you in the right direction. Just got to be patient, and learn to slow down and pay attention.